What My First Trip to Miraval Taught Me About Unplugging

On my first trip to Miraval, my phone went into a little cotton bag labeled "Cellphone Sleeping Bag." I met more people, felt less anxious and thought more clearly than I had in months.

This article is about that trip, the no-phone rule and why I think every leader needs time away from the screen.

The no-phone rule

Miraval asks guests to keep their phones out of the shared spaces. You're handed a small bag for it, printed with three words: Unplug. Be Present.

My first reaction was a small wave of worry. What if someone needed me? What if something happened at work?

That reaction told me more than I wanted to know. I couldn't remember the last time I'd gone a few hours without checking my phone on purpose.

Meeting people again

The first thing I noticed was the people. Without phones, everyone at breakfast looked up. Strangers talked to each other.

I had real conversations with people I would have walked past anywhere else. Some were founders and executives. Some were doing something completely different with their lives. All of them were easier to talk to without a screen between us.

At home, I'd fill every gap with my phone. A line at the coffee shop, a few minutes before a meeting, a pause at dinner. At Miraval, those gaps became the place where I met people.

Lower anxiety

By the second day, I felt calmer. The background worry I carry most days had gone quiet.

I don't think that was a coincidence. A phone keeps a little part of your mind on alert all the time. Every buzz is a small question you haven't answered yet.

There's research behind this. A University of Texas at Austin study found that people did worse on tests of memory and focus when their phone was just sitting on the desk, even turned off. Moving the phone to another room helped.

That matched what I felt. The phone didn't need to ring to take up space in my head. It only needed to be close.

Thinking more clearly

One morning I walked the labyrinth, a winding path lined with white stones under the cedar trees. It takes a while to reach the middle, and there's nothing to do but walk.

Halfway through, I started thinking about my work in a way I hadn't in a long time. Not what was due that week, but what actually mattered over the next few years.

I've written about this before in the most productive hour I spent in New York. Good thinking needs space. Most of us never give ourselves any.

Why this matters for leaders

A leader's job is judgment. Deciding what matters, what to stop and who to trust. Judgment needs a clear head, and a clear head is hard to keep when you check your phone every few minutes.

• Your team copies you. If you answer messages at dinner, they will too.
• Constant checking feels like work. Most of it isn't. I wrote about that in a full calendar isn't progress.
• People notice when you're present. A conversation where you put the phone away is a different conversation.
• Anxiety spreads. A leader who's always on edge sets the tone for everyone else.

How I unplug now

I can't live at Miraval, and neither can you. But I brought a few habits home.

1. Phone in another room. When I need to think, the phone isn't on the desk. Not face down. Somewhere else.
2. No phone at meals. Breakfast and dinner are for the people at the table.
3. First hour without it. I try not to start the day reading other people's priorities.
4. Walk without headphones. Some of my best ideas show up on walks when nothing else is competing for attention.
5. A few days a year fully off. Time away with no work at all, planned ahead so nobody needs me.

None of this is complicated. The hard part is the first few hours, when your hand keeps reaching for a phone that isn't there.

What I took home

I left Miraval with more energy and a few new friends. I also left with a question I still ask myself: is this worth looking at right now, or is it just a habit?

Most of the time it's a habit. Being present for the people in front of you is one of the simplest things a leader can do, and one of the rarest. More on that in Leadership & Legacy and in your identity was never what you do.

Why this is hard for leaders

Stress is common at the top. The American Psychological Association's Stress in America surveys have found year after year that most adults report stress symptoms, and constant connection is part of the picture. Leaders often feel they can't be the one who's unreachable.

A few days offline is a small test with a big payoff. Most companies keep running without their leader for a weekend. I wrote about the same idea in an hour in New York and about how screen time is changing in what I learned in 2025.

If you're building something ambitious, let's connect on LinkedIn.